Dear God

Or whoever you are, if you are listening and seeing from wherever you are…

You know I am struggling and i need help…

You know I need the strength:

To carry on …

To hold on .. or maybe let go..

To believe in you..

To believe life is beautiful..

To know I am strong..

To know this misery would end …

To know I will be happy Again…

You know since i realised what god is which was only very recently ..

I stopped asking you for anything for my life ..

I always talked to you as if you know what i would need, i trusted you, but that doesn’t mean that you would just give me tears… endless ones, where i have no one to wipe them apart from my self because god I am tired….

I am tired and even though i want to hold on I am struggling …

I know many would say that you are probably giving me all this because you have a plan for me and maybe you do! .. and believe me I want to trust you but its shaking….

Its scary …

You know its dark where i am – the girl who used to spread lightness!

I am today again in the place where i did not wanted to ever return…

I promised myself and you, that i wont be this low… But I am struggling.

Dear God

I want to trust you…

I want to believe you are there…

You know I don’t ask for anything but to guide me and give me strength…

You know for big decisions when i am very confused in my life I surrender to you … then why is my belief shaking today yet again ….

Dear God before i go to bed tonight please take care of my and give me that strength.

That courage ….

That belief …

That smile…

That power to believe in just you and no one else ..

Dear God I trust you … when i have no one i hope I am able to wipe my tears and don’t loose hope while i am doing so..

Thank for listening God …

Thank you